Success

It's natural to look at others who’ve achieved things we dream of achieving and wish we could be like them. And we often think to ourselves if I ever accomplish what they have, then I’ll be successful. But that view is limited, even dare I say naïve, because no matter what level we are at, with only a few rare exceptions, we always yearn for more. Once we reach a new level the elation only lasts so long, most of the time much less than we anticipate. And quicker than we like we see the next level, and that becomes our new goal, our new obsession. It’s like hiking a mountain and setting our sights on the nearest horizon. But once we reach that horizon a new one, further away pops into view. As far as I can see, at least in terms of writing or careers in general, this recursive process never ends, unless we give up. I’m not sure there is a “top of the mountain” in our lifetimes. So instead of coveting those milestone moments, wishing they’d happen more frequently, or more easily, what if we simply enjoyed the journey upwards, celebrated each hard fought step along the way. It helps to remember that in climbing a mountain each step is required, not just the steps that cross us over new horizons.

Now, I realize that along the way it's easy to get discouraged, especially when we see others perform so much better than we do ourselves, or when we don't follow through on our own goals as competently or rapidly as we wish. Me and discouragement we’ve met, we’re on a first name basis. I don’t want to bore you with my unrealized goals, it would take way too much time. So let’s just move on.

I recently learned something new. Well that’s not exactly right. I’m sure I’ve known it for a long time, it’s an old truth. But recently it was clarified in a new way that stuck out to me—it sunk in. Are you ready for it? Here it is: success is something you and I get to define, if we want. We can choose to cling to the disappointments and wallow in misery, denigrating ourselves and our work forever. This is the easy road though; it gives us excuses to not succeed. Or on the other hand we can grab hold of anything positive, uplifting, no matter how small, no matter how few and far between they occur—even a single step. When we celebrate these tiny victories we're more likely to keep going, to endure to the end.

Hard work is what it's all about, not talent or opportunities—thanks for teaching me Howard Tayler. And rather than compare ourselves against our friends and idols we should compare ourselves against ourselves. Instead of saying:  why can’t I be like her? Or why is he always so much better than me? (or is it I? Dang, where’s Annette Lyon when I need her.) Or why did they get the big contract instead of me? Ask yourself: am I progressing? Am I better today than yesterday? Am I working hard to get better tomorrow? If we can say yes to any of these we should pat ourselves on the back, enjoy the moment, and then get back to work.

I spent three days at LDS Storymakers 2012 writer’s conference last week. And it was great! Yes, I’m using that exclamation point. But at the same time it wasn’t perfect, there were some ups and some downs. What’s important though is what I take away. There are really only two options: move forward, or fall behind. I had so many positives that far outweighed any of the piddly negatives how can I not move forward? This was my first Storymakers conference. Hi, I’m new. But I want to share with you how I measured success this year.

1- Thursday, I met some fantastic writers at my table at bootcamp. They gave me valuable feedback on my WIP. And even though some of it was difficult to hear, I appreciate every bit and recognize the spirit it was given in—to help me get better as a writer. More than the feedback though, they gave me heaping doses of encouragement during bootcamp and throughout the conference. I saw them in sessions, at meals and at keynotes.

2- Friday, day 1 of the main part of the conference, I was scheduled for a pitch session with agent Holly Root. (I’m so tempted to write secret agent Holly Root, it has a nice ring to it don’t you think?) I was nervous, so nervous. But Storymakers came through for me again. I randomly ate lunch with a couple writers from Gilbert, Arizona—a hot bed for writers I now understand. Anyway, these writers were talking about pitches; in fact one of them had already been to his pitch session. He gave me his pitch, which was very good by the way. But then he asked me for mine. I awkwardly stumbled through mine and to my surprise they said good job—in effect "you worked hard on that" at least that's how I choose to remember it in hindsight. They pointed out parts they liked and made suggestions for what I could add to make it better. But what they really did was push me over the hump of "can I really do this?" to hey "I think I can." Back in December I signed up to pitch more to kick my own writing hindside into action than to actually convince Holly to really look at my work. But now I think I can. My 10 minutes with Holly were positive, encouraging, and I left wanting to finish my WIP ASAP. Mission accomplished in spades—that alone was worth attending Storymakers.

3- Saturday I was in a session when Heather Moore came in and sat down next to me. After the session was over we chatted like two writers at a conference. Now, I've attended a PEG critique session but I think I was only casually introduced to Heather. But in our conversation it felt like she at least remembered my name. Wow, Heather Moore remembered me, or at least recognized my name. The most enlightening thing about our conversation is that even someone published as much as Heather is still working, learning and growing, pushing herself to the next level in her career. And when I realized that I felt in a small way that we had something in common. I mean no disrespect to Heather, I simply mean we both have a desire to move our writing careers forward. For me I hope to have a writing career someday, and for her to bump hers up a notch.

Success can be defined any way you choose. And if you're not careful you may just place it out of your own reach through comparisons to others, or by allowing someone else, the world maybe, to define what success is for you. I choose bask in my little victories, and cling to the precious, positive moments. And I am going to get back to work on my writing.

Thanks to everyone I met at Storymakers, the members of my critique group, the people I met, and all the fantastic presenters and volunteers who made my first Storymakers memorable—a real success! And especially to everyone at any table who shared their pitches with me, and asked that I give my pitch to them. I'll be back.

Scott Clayton The Writer

Credits: Heather Moore was the spark for this post and Howard Tayler was the heart—he worked hard on his presentation. And I also credit so many others who I rubbed shoulders with during the conference. Sheesh, you’d think I’d won an award or something. Hmm, now that I think of it, maybe I did—just not one of those showy kinds of awards that everyone else knows about.

Balance: Motorcycles and Writing

Turn the key, press the starter and the engine rumbles to life; on a cold morning, like today, I might need to use the choke. The engine idles for a minute, beating away till it warms up. My left hand squeezes the clutch. My left foot taps the gear lever down, snapping it into first. I slowly release the clutch with my left hand while revving up the throttle with my right. I pick up my right foot as the wheels start to turn, resting it on the foot peg. I rev it some more and accelerate into the road, settling into equilibrium on two wheels. A few feet down the road I relax the throttle, squeeze the clutch, and pop the gear lever up into second. More throttle and the engine rumbles effortlessly up to speed, a little more than I should through our quiet neighborhood sometimes, but I can’t help it.

The wind in my face, the smell of cut grass or hay, the engine roaring, the warmth of the sun catching up at a stop, the awesome power for the most part untapped held in reserve, accelerating up, hanging on, leaning into the curves, combined with the flawless execution of the controls required to make all this happen is a liberating experience. When it all comes together, senses alive and alert, everything is in balance.

But each spring, when I ride again for the first time after a long winter break, it’s easy to recognize when something’s not in balance. Maybe I pop the clutch too fast and the engine kills. Maybe I sit crooked in the seat, making the handle bars feel twisted to one side. Maybe I stop too quickly, or place my feet in the wrong position and the bike leans too far to the side almost toppling over. Or maybe I forget to turn off the turn signal. No matter what, if something’s out of balance it just doesn’t feel right.

Getting everything right to operate a motorcycle may sound intimidating to some. But with some practice it can easily be mastered by anyone willing to put in a little effort. I think writing is similar. There are many rules, and even more guidelines that make everything about writing seem intimidating. But with practice and effort I’ve heard it can be mastered. Balance in writing is difficult to describe, but easily felt when it’s not there.

My quest for balance in writing continues this week at the LDStorymakers Writers Conference. I’ve been frantically working on my fifteen pages for Boot Camp, a hands-on critique workshop. I’m stressing over what to say in my ten minute pitch session to an actual literary agent. And I’m looking forward to two days chock-full of classes and workshops covering craft basics, advanced craft, genre, and marketing/career development taught by world class authors. In addition I hope to meet new writer friends as well.

Even though I use these kinds of milestones to work towards I realize this is a journey not a destination. I never seem to be able to spend enough time to make things as good as I expect them to be, but at least I’m making progress. And if I don’t go into Storymakers feeling rock solid prepared, I plan to go with confidence. Not because of what I’ve done so far, but because of what I hope to become—better tomorrow than I was today.

I’m constantly reading helpful blogs that hit me when I need them the most. Here are a couple I read this week: Race in YA Lit: Wake Up & Smell the Coffee-Colored Skin, White Authors! and the very appropriate How to talk to strangers at professional events.

One more thing worth mentioning I just finished reading Scene and Structure by Jack Bickham. I learned a lot from this book. And I’m currently reading Story Engineering: Mastering the 6 Core Competencies of Successful Writing by Larry Brooks.